Question: I have been on my job for about a year, and things were going well until recently. My boss has been joking about me in meetings, leaving me out of important conversations and giving me unnecessarily harsh deadlines.
I feel singled out and am ready to quit. What’s up?
Answer: As unpleasant as what you describe is, it sounds as though you might be being “Quiet Fired,” a technique that managers may use to make the work environment so unpleasant that you just quit instead of forcing them to actually fire you.
Remember when everyone was talking about the “Quiet Quitting” trend? That described a phenomenon where employees purposefully checked out from their jobs and did the bare minimum, skating by until they found another position. What you describe is the reverse of that; your employer has detached from you in the hopes you’ll find something else.
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Why Companies ‘Quiet Fire’ Employees
Firing an employee is a time consuming, legal and emotional process. There are sometimes costs involved, such as a severance, perks or other compensation to make up for the dismissal if the change is happening because of a reduction in workforce, merger or acquisition or change in workload. To avoid these costs, some companies see it as “cheaper” if an employee quits rather than is put through the termination process.
While not technically illegal, quiet firing is distasteful, emotionally manipulative and can tarnish a company’s reputation for years to come.
How Companies ‘Quiet Fire’ Employees
Think of quiet firing as a passive-aggressive form of management. Behavior that is unfavorable and could qualify includes:
- Setting unrealistic work conditions (such as sudden excessive travel for an employee with young children or who attends night school).
- Unhealthy changes to work conditions (requiring a return to in-person work for employees who would have to travel a long distance, removing key perks the employee has become accustomed to, suddenly micromanaging your work or reassigning work assignments to less qualified employees, thus stressing the team).
- Withholding support or offering a lack of communication around goals, career progress, status and other key elements of an employee’s performance that inspire continued motivation and success.
While some of these changes can otherwise be explained (budgets being slashed, downsizing, changes in management philosophy or the employee’s questionable performance), some of these sudden alterations to “normal” workstyle can indicate the employer’s desire to push employees out.
Costs of ‘Quiet Firing’
The consequences for this practice are many. As mentioned in this Forbes article, “Quiet firing is petty, unethical, and shows signs of weak leadership. This could affect an employee’s mental health, as well as potentially damage a company’s reputation.”
To the employee, thoughts of inadequacy, ineffectiveness and isolation can lead the individual to feel they are alone and unsupported, embarrassed for being “targeted” and may cause them to question their career choices in entirety.
What to Do if You Think This Is Happening to You
Before you quit the job and slink out the back door, take a pause. Has something in the market, industry, company or with your boss happened that could explain these changes? Has your performance declined (legitimately)?
Talk to a mentor. Sometimes it’s hard to see what’s happening objectively, because you’re in the middle of it. A mentor can help you separate fact from emotion and may shed light on alternative explanations for what you’re experiencing.
Document the changes you’re seeing and feeling. How often are meetings being scheduled and you’re left off the invite? Which key projects of yours are being reassigned? What new requests are being made of you that feel unfair or unjust?
As you navigate this situation -- and assuming you might be correct, and the company is hoping you’ll leave -- dust off your resume and update your online profiles (LinkedIn and other job sites). Don’t advertise that you’re looking to move (not yet), but update them with current results, accomplishments and accolades.
If the situation persists, discuss this with your manager. Let them know what you’ve experienced and observed and see whether there’s another explanation. Be careful making assumptions and accusations and causing them to feel defensive. Start the conversation off emotionally neutral in case there is another explanation.
If the outcome is that you should leave the company, try to do so with as much grace and professionalism as you can muster. Just because they acted inappropriately doesn’t mean you should.
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